'I was 16 when I found out I’d never have a period – now I’m finding my own path to motherhood'

From fertility and family life to the choices shaping our future, some of the biggest questions facing society will take centre stage in Leeds this week as the Leeds International Festival of Ideas gets under way.

Bringing together broadcasters, writers, thinkers and people with deeply personal stories to tell, the festival promises conversations designed to challenge, provoke and inspire.

And among the questions being asked is one that feels increasingly relevant: in a world where we have more choices than ever, are children still part of the plan?

Betty Mukherjee has known for over a decade that her journey to parenthood would look quite different to that of her peers.

She was 16 when doctors told her she had MRKH – Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser syndrome – a condition that meant she had been born without a womb or cervix and would never have a period.

And now she is part of the thought provoking panel this week exploring what parenthood means.

“It was a life changing diagnosis,” Betty, now 28, says.

“I remember the doctor saying, ‘you won't be thinking about having kids yet’. But that was all I was then worrying about - what does my future look like? Am I going to have a boyfriend? Is anyone going to marry me? I've always been a bit of a chronic overthinker which didn’t help.

“And I think as a teenager, you are thinking those things anyway. It's like who am I? What's my identity? Who am I surrounding myself with? And so to be given this huge identity that I didn't know what to do with was massive.

“I actually went into denial for a long, long time. I didn't really talk about it. I didn't really tell my friends. I used to carry tampons in my bag in case anyone asked if I had one so I could cover up the fact that I didn't have a period. It was like living a bit of a lie for quite a few years.”

Her mindset changed when Betty appeared on BBC’s Race Across the World in 2024 alongside her brother, James. In a heart-to-heart captured on camera during their journey from Japan to Indonesia, she opened up about the emotional weight she carried as a result of her diagnosis. Since appearing on the travel adventure show, Betty has become an advocate for life with MRKH, using her platform to raise awareness of the condition and support the one in every 5,000 people affected.

The panel entitled “Are kids still part of the plan?” explores the subject on Saturday afternoon at Leeds Playhouse.

“It’s such a relevant topic. We've seen that shift in culture of women waiting until later to have children,” notes Betty, who lives in Silsden, West Yorkshire.

“And I just think things like egg freezing and embryo freezing and alternative ways to parenthood are going to be more common, even for women who potentially could naturally conceive.”

Fellow panellist, broadcaster Johnny I’Anson, who has two daughters with fellow BBC presenter Keeley Donovan, says the conversation is a salient one in a “bold, adventurous and powerful” festival. Reflecting on the changing birth rates, he says: “We have never had as much choice in our life, whether that's careers, opportunities to travel, or whether that's just a really rich and varied social life, that people often don't want to sacrifice."

For Betty, kids have always been part of the plan. But the route of how she’ll get there remains unknown.

She and her partner have recently undergone two rounds of IVF and now have six embryos frozen for the future. One option they may consider is surrogacy, but Betty is also exploring taking part in a pioneering womb transplant trial. After losing her mum following a short period with cancer earlier this year, she is also coming to terms with the idea of a parenting journey without her own mother around for support.

“You can never be certain of anything really in this world and you never know what's going to happen and when,” Betty reflects. “My mum always taught us to just take the opportunities in front of us - that's all you can do within your control and then the rest is out of your control. It’s learning to be okay with that I suppose.”

“I feel weirdly at peace now, definitely with my diagnosis and kind of with whatever journey it's going to take us on next,” she adds.

“I think at one point in my life I was very certain that womb transplant was the only way I wanted to go if I wanted to be pregnant because I wanted to carry my own child. But I think the older I get and the more I think about the prospect of just having a child, I think as long as it's happy and healthy, it doesn't matter how it comes into the world.”

Leeds International Festival of Ideas opens tomorrow with a fireside chat with journalist and documentary maker Louis Theroux. The final day on Saturday begins with the discussion Are Kids Still Part Of The Plan? which takes place at Leeds Playhouse Courtyard Theatre at 2pm. Visit leedsinternationalfestival.com